Vote Better: Field Trip!

Asking the Tough Questions

"Hugo Chavez? Wasn't he in N*Sync?"

George Will is one of the nation’s greatest and well-respected conservatives, and I mean real down-to-earth, wise, you-could-learn-something-from-him conservative, not the corrupt lunatics who go around calling themselves conservatives kind of conservative.  George Will’s column last week made the argument that a good reason to vote McCain is to provide a check on the inevitably Democratic congress and prevent an all-Democratic government from overspending and overextending itself the way the all-Republican government did from 2000-2006.  A good point. BUT, this week, George Will’s column is about how McCain’s wildly dumb response to the financial panic last week made him realize that John McCain sucks and would be a terrifying president. I love it when real conservatives have that moment of clarity and put down the Kool-Aid. Read the article here.

Now allow me to elaborate.  McCain’s biggest problem is that he has no fucking idea what he’s talking about most of the time, but he loves to sound grim and important.  The market collapse is a great example.  Since his gravitas is not backed up by a deep understanding of the issues, it’s ultimately more about ego-stroking and having a righteous excuse for sounding angry.  He’s known around Washington for his volatile temper. He has a tendency to make rash or contrarian decisions when baited into spats.

And Exhibits A, B, and C of McCain’s poor judgment is Sarah “Pay for Your Own Rape Forensics, You Little Hussy” Palin.  I bring it up because today is Sarah’s big day, she’s on a field trip to the UN!  Unfortunately, the only foreign policy she knows is whatever talking points she’s memorized from the flash cards Joe Lieberman gave her, and that makes the McCain press team nervous.  Therefore, they decided that no reporters would be allowed into Palin’s meetings with foreign leaders, only cameras. In other words, “We want pictures of Sarah Palin with Ban-Ki Moon and Bono, but we don’t want people to know she’s asking about the chords to ‘Where the Streets Have No Name.'”  Luckily CNN said they would rather not cover her at all than be used as puppets, and got an editorial producer allowed into the meetings. Read more about it here. I think we’ve all learned a valuable lesson, though:  the only relevant question about Sarah Palin is, “Should the vice president be pretty?”  Asking a woman questions about her mind, thoughts, and ideas is outrageous and offensive and an insult to feminism.  Clearly, Palin’s most relevant experience here is not her work as a mayor or governor, but being a beauty pageant contestant. McCain: Honor, Courage, Honesty.

So basically, either McCain thinks that this person is actually the best qualified to take over for him if he, a 72-year old with a history of cancer, dies in office; or, he doesn’t give a shit and picked her because she’s young and hot and religious fundamentalists will vote for her.  McCain: Character, Integrity, Responsibility.

Back in the real world, Barack Obama admitted today that even if he is elected, a lot of his big plans for health care and education will now have to wait until the financial landscape is a little clearer.  Prudent, realistic, and honest.  Meanwhile, just before the market crashed, McCain published an article in this month’s Contingencies magazine that praises the deregulation of Wall Street and says that if we follow his health care plan, he’ll deregulate that industry just like he deregulated the financial sector, and look how great that worked out! Oops.  Sorry if that makes you look ultra-stupid, John, but uh, well, you shouldn’t keeping doing stupid shit all the time.

Bringing us back to the point that McCain is super ignorant and gets self-righteous about things over which he has a poor rational grasp. Which is, sadly, how Republicans like their presidents.  I think they should probably stop using slogans that associate McCain with adjectives that have nothing to do with the way he’s behaving and go with something different, like “McCain/Palin:  Because Smart People Sound Like Assholes.”  Especially George Will.


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