Okay, one more thing. Apparently the First Dog story has captured and taken hostage the “AWW” section of every American brain, which is an obvious logical consequence of puppies being adorable.  The Chicago Tribune reports that the Obamas are leaning towards the mixed breed known as the “Goldendoodle.” While I can’t get behind anything with the suffix “-doodle” without thinking of Ned Flanders, get a load of this cutepile:

Deputy Undersecretary of Smiles

Deputy Undersecretary of Smiles

Obama’s foreign policy will primarily consist of bringing Undersecretary Smiles to all high-level negotiations, rendering potential troublemakers such as Mahmoud Ahmadenijad and Vladimir Putin utterly defenseless.  I think this is also a signal that Natalie Portman and Rashida Jones will be receiving valuable cabinet positions.


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