Career Day at the Madrassa

Yes yes, sure it’s awful that there’s all this piracy off the Somali coast, how savage and mercenary and whatnot. But really we all think it’s incredibly entertaining and awesome that pirates are once again the scourge of the seas. So to help ease your social conscience after silently rooting for Real Pirates, read this article about how said pirates are actually using their stolen treasures to build secure communities in Somalia with lower levels of violence than the country as a whole, offering a more capitalistic and secular lifestyle with less emphasis on being randomly killed on the street.

Imagine for a moment that you are a young Muslim male and it’s Career Day at your madrassa.  The only booth there says “Jihad.”  The Jihadist booth has directions to an embassy somewhere and a belt made of dynamite, and a big picture of 72 naked virgins. Appealing?

Well suddenly a new booth opens up that says “Piracy,” and signing up for the Pirate team comes with random swag, a ramshackle condo near the Gulf of Aden, and the explosives you’re given are generally aimed away from you. Oh and you can interact with real-life women, with their VEILS OFF, even before you are dead.

This is how you win hearts and minds: Pirates, dammit.  They are our allies in the Wuhr on Tuhrr’r.  And people say raw capitalism has no social conscience.


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